My Plans To Ride the Rails Because There’s Nothing Better to do When There Aren’t Jobs Anymore

Dear fucking lord. I was watching CNN because I missed the debate when it was interrupted by a breaking news story.   It switched over to CNN International so I could watch the entire world explode.  There’s a British economist in red suspenders mocking the anchors for still having money in something as unreliable as currency.

So with this I give you the abyss we all like to call the future.

Chuck Klosterman is really funny again and plots out the rest of the twenty-first century for us, or whats left of it.

MAY 24, 2029: Eighty-eight-year-old Bob Dylan celebrates his birthday with the online release of “Oh, By the Way,” a fourteen-minute song explicitly explaining the details of his 1966 motorcycle crash, his brief conversion to Christianity during the seventies, and what it was like to have sex with Joan Baez. When asked why he chose to release such personal material at this point in his life, Dylan cryptically replies, “That seems like a question you should be asking Bob Dylan.”

The European markets just opened, but only for a few minutes. Then their power got shut off.

One Response to “My Plans To Ride the Rails Because There’s Nothing Better to do When There Aren’t Jobs Anymore”

  1. what are you talking about? the markets are kicking ass. did you watch that shit today? most intense sports game i have ever watched. i had no idea who was going to win. apparently, everyone lost.

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